Sunday, November 16, 2008

TOOLS!



TOOLS. How many of us have scissors, a measuring tape or ruler or both, some safety pins and a few other useful TOOLS in that kitchen catchall drawer?

Yup, sometimes the items walk, most often the scissors. So we have to send out a search party. We know we're the ones who will find said lost item in the end, but enjoy the chance to share the aggravation with everyone else in the house.


But other tools - the screwdriver, the hammer, the pliers.... Please explain why THOSE tools are out of sight, out of reach, and annoying to retrieve? They're in the basement, or the garage, or -- whichever location is the most inconvenient in your house. That male with whom you live laid claim to them, and doesn't really want to share.


But he takes forever to get around to the little jobs - unless they were his idea, and then requires every toy - err, tool - to do the job.


Please explain why a screwdriver, hammer, and pliers aren't in that kitchen catchall drawer. Really, they should be right there, ready at a moment's notice.


Oh, I know. You have to use the 'correct' screwdriver, hammer or pliers. You must choose the correct one from half a dozen - six that don't look very different at all. Don't try to convince that male that a flat screwdriver will work on most Phillips head screws, or that 90+% of the hammering jobs require a basic, lightweight hammer, or that pliers are pliers.


But they know. They know that those few tools would do most of the work. And we'd do the small jobs ourselves - and that would reduce the constant drone of 'honey, the picture still needs to be hung; the dust is an inch thick'.


Is it possible that they like hearing our voices so much that they intentionally avoid doing the simple things that would make us so happy, happier than opening another box of chocolates while on a diet?


MEN.


The reason women use butter knives as screwdrivers, shoes as hammers, and even scissors as pliers!

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